The Chemo Club is so excited to get to know you!!! Please introduce yourself (Name, where you’re from) - What was your life like before undergoing chemotherapy?
Hi! My name is Halley Eidson from Chicago.
Cancer took a lot from me but one thing I am not sad about is that it shook me awake from this very career-consumed version of myself I didn’t love that much. Now, I am still competitive, hardworking and goal-oriented, but the wins and losses of my job don’t impact my spirit in the same way that it used to and that has brought an immense amount of confidence and power I didn’t realize I had until I went through all of this. This shift in priorities is something I will forever be grateful for and in many ways made me the person I was working so hard to be before but could never get to because in so many ways I was being held back by the fear of disappointing people. That fear went out the door with cancer.
Aside from the not-so-fun career person that I was, I was fun in a lot of other parts of my life. I have an amazing relationship with my husband and we love hiking, traveling, going to incredible (and ridiculous) restaurants. We are also professional streamers and can knock out whole seasons of critically acclaimed television in a weekend.
Pre-pandemic, we loved going to yoga classes and I can’t wait for the world to be open again to start those up. We have a cat who is demanding, mean and we love her. We have an incredibly fun life with great friends and family. Before cancer and the pandemic, it was weekend getaways and get-togethers with friends. Being in your 30s in a big city is a ton of fun and we were having all of it.
Bring us along your journey – when were you diagnosed with cancer? What was your initial reaction?
I was diagnosed with cancer last year on my 33rd birthday (January 28th). For 3-months prior to being diagnosed I experienced symptoms that would crescendo into going to the emergency room for help.
It started in October when I felt more tired than normal. I always go for a brisk 3-5 mile walk every morning and the fatigue and weakness got so bad by November I couldn’t go at all. November was also the time the cough began. What started somewhat mild grew stronger and stronger. I describe this cough as the feeling of pulling a tube-sock inside out from my esophagus. It was so aggressive I would start to puke at the end of the coughing fit. November was also the first month I went to the urgent care and after a negative covid test they wrote it off as “seasonal cold.” When we went to my mother in laws for Thanksgiving, my weight loss was also noticeable and my family thought something was going on.
By December, my cough was disruptive in all areas of my life. I couldn’t stop. I would have sales calls with customers and have to go on mute. There were minutes during the fits I could barely breathe. By the end of the December, I also felt like my lungs had shrunk. The deepest breathe I would take was so tiny and I couldn’t walk up more than 5 steps up stairs without taking a break to calm down my breathing. Another trip to the urgent care…another clean bill of health and advice to take Nyquil.
By the start of January, I had to do more. I was so tired I would wake up at 8am, have to take a nap mid-day, by 5pm I would shuffle over to our couch and watch the clock until it turned 8pm and I felt the time was appropriate to go to bed even though I could have easily called it a day at 5pm. The coughing was non stop and I felt like my lungs were getting smaller. And then one night I had a dream…
One night in early January I had a dream where I was in my grandmother’s front yard. This was my grandmother who had passed away in 2018. I was about 5 years old and could see that a storm was rolling in. I turn around and my grandmother ushers me inside and tells me to get in here immediately. I go inside, she crosses her arms and says, “you shouldn’t be here.” My grandmother is a very beautiful, strong, Kentucky woman and when she makes a demand or statement - it is heard loud and clear. She said it again, “you shouldn’t be here.” I walk to the next room to play with a dollhouse and she follows me and stops in the doorway, “I don’t know why you are here. But you should not be here.” Then she directs me to the bathroom, draws a bath and tells me to get in. I get in the bath and she dunks my head. I go under water then (in real life) I wake up.
After that dream, I started to experience night sweats daily.
After another series of urgent care and desperate attempts to cure myself with a healthy diet, exercise and an IV clinic that made my left arm balloon up – I go to the emergency room.
My husband and I went into the emergency room with zero expectations. I explained my symptoms of coughing, exhaustion and night sweats to about a dozen different doctors. The x-ray showed an 11 cm mass in my chest. The bloodwork showed elevations of inflammatory responses. The CT scan showed approximately 2-liters of fluid in my lungs which collapsed one and had the other at 25-30% operating capacity. And the ER doctor said “well, we hope it’s lymphoma.”
The next day I went through the painful and frightening procedure of draining my lungs. I ended up hyperventilating and passing out during this procedure. Immediately after and still hazy after passing out, was when the first biopsy was taken.
My first diagnosis was Hodgkin’s Lymphoma. I am incredibly lucky that I live in a city like Chicago where I have so many options for outstanding care. Northwestern Medicine was my top choice and my top-choice doctor was accepting new patients. My type-A personality is put to work and I was on the schedule within days. Fast forward to another surgical biopsy, I received an updated diagnosis of Grey Zone Lymphoma, which is essentially Hodgkin’s and Non-Hodgkin’s Lymphoma at the same time.
What was your first chemotherapy treatment like? What treatment/treatments did you or are currently undergoing?
I had a total of 6 chemotherapy treatments of dose-adjusted R-EPOCH. Each treatment was continuous for about 100 hours at a time, so I would be admitted to the hospital Monday-Friday for treatment. For most people I explain this plan to…it terrifies them.
If I had to rank them from worst to easiest it would go like this - 5 (worst), 4, 1, 3, 6, 2. To be clear, each one was hard, sucked and just not fun. Nothing easy about it.
The first chemotherapy treatment was also the scariest. There was so much unknown and while I had read other people’s stories and even reached out to random people on Instagram, there was not any research you can do to fully prepare you. So for any one reading this, I hope it helps but you won’t feel at ease with curiosity until the first session is done.
I started my day with my doctor in late morning. It was the first time my port was going to be used so that team was also going to prep it for the week-long chemotherapy I was about to experience. The first use of the port was scary. You can’t see the needle being put in so I was trying to focus attention elsewhere. I also was afraid of how it would feel. It takes about two seconds for the needle to go in an then about 30 for them to put the dressing and different tubes connected to it. Once that was in, they flushed the port which does not feel like anything but tastes like hand sanitizer. You will taste it even though it gets no where near your mouth. I was prepped and ready. I even wore a special cashmere sweater with a V-neck for easy access.
Chemo Tip #1: Get comfy sweaters with v-necks, buttons/zippers down the collar for easy port access.
Then my husband and I had to wait for a bed to open in the Women’s Hospital on their Chemo/Stem Cell floor. We anticipated this wait taking 2-3 hours. It took about 6-7 hours. As two professional work-from-home Software Sales humans, we were lucky that with the swift opening of our computers we could immediately be transported to our cloud worlds and pretend like we weren’t in Cancerland.
I got in a room at the end of our remote work day (5pm) and we started with Rituximab. Rituximab is an immunotherapy that can cause allergic reactions so I had to be watched closely. About 15 minutes in my ears started to scratch and turn red. This itchiness could escalate quickly into shock so the first ‘bag’ of treatment which was supposed to take 2 hours ended up taking about 8. I was already behind schedule. My old self was not pleased.
Chemo Tip #2: Make your hospital room your own. Go to target and get cute bedding, pillows, decoration and snacks. Bring your own pillow.
After that treatment, I had 4 bags of chemotherapy that each took about 22 hours each. They were bright orange - the exact same color as orange Gatorade. I would need to have vital checks every two hours (even at night) to make sure my heart, lungs and oxygen levels were fine. Anytime they would change the bags it would be a bit of a ceremony. Two nurses would be in attendance, I would state my birthday and full name. The first nurse would read my birthday, full name and patient ID number. The second nurse would scan the code on my wrist, then read my birthday, full name and patient ID number from the computer while nurse #1 would check. Once that is confirmed, they check a few boxes in their system then clip in the new bag.
The days - I took the ‘fake it til you make it’ approach. I could set up my home office in my hospital room and work with my customers via zoom. Obviously I would not turn my camera on and I would have to mute myself anytime my IV machine would start beeping… it was crazy but it worked. During the first 3 treatments, it really was business as usual in a new setting.
Due to COVID, my husband could only be with me between 10am - 8pm. He would always come at lunchtime and bring some good stuff from the outside. Then we would work in our hospital office together for the afternoon. Once again – was a nice escape from the Cancerland mentality.
The nights - Once we would close our laptops, Alex (my husband) and I would start searching for places near by where he could pick up food for dinner. To sing Chicago’s praises, we have some of the best restaurants in the world. We would watch cable television together until his curfew hit and he had to leave. It was always sad when he left and it was just me and the nurses.
The first chemo side effect that really kicked in was insomnia. I had to take prednisone during treatment which made it nearly impossible to sleep. I spent a lot of time on instagram, facebook and researching things that popped in my head on wikipedia. When you are in a hospital and in extreme quarantine, what you see online is very much your reality and it definitely was for me. Those nights, every two hours nurses would check on my vitals and in between I was a full on insta-stalker. I also know a lot about the Tip-Top-Tap building that I could see outside of my window. Another sad thing – the women’s hospital is directly across from the Children’s Hospital and our rooms would face each other. I didn’t realize that the COVID rules I had with my husband, the children had with their parents and family. Sometimes I would sit in the window and could see the kids sitting in theirs, too. All of us were in the same boat.
Rinse and repeat for 4-days, and I was out of there. Due to the longer Rituximab administration I was out on Saturday instead of Friday.
My husband picked me up and I felt like we were breaking out in our getaway car! Now…just had to go back again 5 more times over the next 4-months.
Who did you turn to as your support system?
My husband, Alex, was my biggest support system. It was never an “I have cancer” situation, it was a “we have cancer” mentality. While I took on the physical impact, he was there for everything. He was involved with every single motion and thought I had during that time and I couldn’t imagine anyone being more supportive. While I’ve read from the horrors of google search that people oftentimes get divorced after the woman gets sick in a marriage… yes that’s a thing… I truly feel that it made us stronger. I don’t there is anything that can break us at this point.
My sister called every single day. Every morning we would talk and sometimes in the afternoons. She was super pregnant so there were a lot of things we were experiencing at the same time, like nausea and food restrictions! It was also a wonderful break to see my niece as well. She was a huge supporter.
My best friend, Leslie, would also call and talk almost all days that I was in treatment. We’ve been friends for almost 20-years and she’s one of the funniest people I know. She also has the most adorable girls who are equally as funny and wild! During my first visit, she would start crying but she absolutely became the comic relief for the rest. She’s also the best at Snapchat and would send fun updates.
My parents and my husband’s mother were all incredibly supportive and involved as well. If it wasn’t for COVID, I think they all would have been fighting to move in with us to help but with the extreme restrictions for quarantined we had to be completely isolated during treatment.
My brother and his family were also incredibly supportive and would talk a lot on snapchat. It’s those little check ins that make a real difference.
My work was the real surprise. I had always been a part of a pressure cooker or what have you done for me lately environment and DocuSign was never that way. From the moment of diagnosis, it was always a how can we help you attitude. I got to keep the ‘dream team’ people I was working with to avoid as much change as possible and they were all onboard to help. My leadership team also all came together and bought us a frozen meal service for 2-weeks. When treatment was finished, they got us a bottle of Dom and a gift card to a sushi restaurant. Really unbelievably supportive more than you would ever think a workplace would be.
This list of support system can really go on and on. I kept my diagnosis private until the treatment was complete because I just couldn’t handle updating so many people about what was going on but even with that close group of immediate family, close friends and the need to knows for work I had an incredible team.
What is something you wished you knew before starting your chemo treatment?
There’s so much!
This may sound stupid but before receiving my treatment plan, I didn’t realize there were different types of chemotherapy. Even after being diagnosed I was googling and thought, “Great! They have chemo pills now. I will do the chemo pills for 4-weeks and be done with this! Obviously I won’t do radiation when I can take chemo pills!” My husband and I had a trip planned in March and we thought, “Surely we will be done with treatment, fully recovered and cured in 6 weeks!” We weren’t even sure if we had to reschedule our vacation. Oh to be young and naïve in Cancerland again!
The side effects will happen but not all of them. They also won’t happen the way you think.
There will be many days that you won’t feel like you have cancer.
Once chemo starts, your cancer symptoms will (or should) stop. No more coughing. No more night sweats. You will be tired but not from cancer. The first night I stopped coughing gave me hope for the whole process.
You are going to look different. Do everything you can to feel better about yourself during this time – buy the wig, draw the eyebrows on, wear a cute shirt, get the good zoom light that makes you look normal on camera! But know, even with all of that stuff you are going to look different and it is going to take time to look in the mirror and see your old self again.
Eat bland or non-spicy foods. The first Friday during treatment we got deep dish pizza. That was my first experience with chemo nausea. My stomach couldn’t handle the pepperoni and the cheese.
Ask your nurses for what you need. If you need Ativan - ask for it. They aren’t going to ask if you need it. You won’t sound like a drug chaser or like you’re faking symptoms to get something. You have cancer and are going through chemotherapy, these drugs were made to help people like you but you have to ask.
Have there been certain side effects that have been worse than others?
Yes. I feel like nausea is the side effect everyone talks about the most. While the last 3-treatments of chemo were incredibly difficult with nausea during and about 2-days after receiving treatment, I could handle it with the drugs prescribed and just counting down the hours. It was not easy but it was not the worst side effect in my opinion.
I am not sure what comes in first place for worst. So the following come in no particular order.
People talk about lethargy but you can’t describe chemo-lethargy. For me, I felt like all of my blood had been drained from my body and I was the walking shell of a human being. It was exhausting to walk to the bathroom (20 feet). It was exhausting to walk from my office to the kitchen (15 feet). It was exhausting to stand up for 2 minutes to wait for my lunch to heat up. Whatever it is, this isn’t “flu like lethargy” this is freak cancer lethargy. Don’t worry - with all of the steroids your mind will be awake and ready to go!
Insomnia. I couldn’t sleep at all. I would toss and turn until 4am. You can’t take tylenol PM or any medication outside of your prescriptions. Ativan can help but is habit forming so its wise to limit it.
Digestive issues. Treatment really messes up your digestive system. In the hospital I would gain about 8-10 pounds of water weight. My skin would feel like a 5 pound sausage in a 3 pound bag. Not comfortable. After about 2-3 days post chemo, everything does go back to normal.
Sensitive Skin. In the last 3-treatments my skin got incredibly sensitive. I would go for walks and come back with blisters all over my feet and toes. If I ate acidic food, it was like putting a chemical peel in my mouth. When the nurses would remove bandages or dressing on my port… my skin would come off with it. So bad. Always ask for the “green dressing” which is for sensitive skin.
Fear. There’s a lot of fear with cancer and chemo. Googling can be a double edged sword. On one side you can find amazing stories with survivors and on the other you can find out about people who die from long term side effects. Googlers beware. Personally, I found a really great therapist on BetterHelp which has been great.
What are tips/tricks you have learned along the way to help with chemo side effects?
Be kind to yourself when you are going through this. It’s not going to be easy and you are strong even though you will never feel like you are. When you look back on what you go through during this time you will be in awe of yourself.
Take a long, hot bath after chemo. Try to sweat out those toxins. It helps with side effects and is calming.
Go for really long walks and stay as active as you can. It really helps with recovery. It will help more than any product or prescription they can give you.
Be kind and patient to other people. You are going to get a lot of opinions and advice on the best treatments for cancer. You are going to get a lot of people asking how you got it and telling you things like sugar, meat, dairy, etc… cause cancer. The first reaction from many people, even the nicest ones, will be something like, “I know what you are going through. My grandma died of cancer.” In almost all of these situations of bad advice, opinions and oversharing are grounded with a good intention. No one knows how to respond to someone with cancer, same reason why we barely know how to respond to having cancer. Try not to let it bother you even though trust me… you will want to punch every vegan in the face who tells you “vegans don’t get cancer.” No offense to vegans… but they need to stop saying that. Steve Jobs got cancer and all he ate was fruit. Google it. That’s a real thing.
Do you recommend any chemo friendly products?
Few things have worked for me –
● Siggi’s Yogurt
● Orgain Protein Shakes
● Big cozy sweaters
● Saltine crackers without salt
● Ativan
● Kiehl’s Sensitive Skincare Line
● Argan Oil - put it everywhere everyday
● Clorox wipes for your hospital. You will want to wipe things down yourself.
● Big cozy blanket and pillow for the hospital.
● Slippers for hospital and real life
● Bath Salts and Essential Oils - After every hospital stay I would take a long hot bath to try and sweat out chemicals. Really worked well with helping side effects.
Any advice for other chemo patients?
Take it one day at a time. Celebrate the small wins. Try to focus on the positive.
